I knew, going into this semester, that taking six classes was going to be a hefty amount of work. That, along with my commitments to all of my other activities, should have taken up most of my time. If I were being completely logical with my time-budgeting and I adhered to the schedule, I probably wouldn't have time to write here right now.
But I'm here right now, while my Java code runs through its cycle comparing 1,000,000-sized lists, so technically I am doing work. What I really should be doing is finish my base-conversion assignment, or get started on my integrate-acceleration-into-velocity program, or really a thousand other things than this.
At least I'm getting some work done, which is more than what Khajiit can say, because he is currently sitting in an armchair with his headphones on reading My Little Pony fanfiction. A fanfiction that uses underlines for emphasis, rather than italics.
My dad said I should be involved in only one extracurricular activity, or at most two. It makes a lot of sense, but I'm just getting to the good parts of programming for the robot (although it is basically a netbook on a fancy frame so it's not that ultra-fancy), and I got approved for my funding application for the environmental documentary that we'll now be screening in March, so I'll definitely have to work more on that, and I've signed up for at least three hours' worth of office hours commitment to the computer club, plus the new environmental committee that I am half-heading which will definitely be exciting.
How could I possibly choose?
So I am going into this semester with so much work, already, and I have been barely maintaining above that 3.7 I needed for my scholarship (thanks to linear algebra), and there will be so much more to do. But I am postponing all of that because I have just been tempted with at least $100 worth of Lego products, and so I will instead go to New York this weekend (among other things, likely possibly visiting Paperclip, although that is rather tenuous right now).
Also, I have been drinking so much Nestea and lattes. I need to find new sugary drinks to replace them before I grow tired of them and run out of suitable water-replacements.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Getting My Head Out Of This Haze
I read about 6.001 today, the MIT course on Scheme, and in essence abstract programming. Is it a bad thing that I instantly thought of 6.01?
I once promised myself, on the campus no less, that I would never go back until I was there by my own merits. I never knew how true that would turn out. There was once upon a time I would say, "Oh, yeah, he's at MIT, no big deal." And I said it out of jealousy, because I really, really want to be there. Being related to something always hurts more, because you are so close, yet not there. Not quite good enough, or, in my case, not quite smart enough or special enough or whatever else it was.
The people around me have different goals. They want to get into the best med school possible. But it's similar, isn't it? And if I focused enough, I should be able to do this. But it means a kind of dedication and work ethic I haven't been able to muster up in a long, long while. I have been relishing in my newfound independence but I haven't been putting up much effort. This past semester has been a few months of rehashing things I have already learned and scrambling to put together things I haven't.
I have some good plans for next semester. I need to schedule them into my calendar, and more importantly, I need to follow my calendar more strictly, rather than just putting things on there. I think I can block out times when I will be able to get work done without being disturbed, and then fill them in week by week. After that, I'll also schedule in all the application work I need to get done, and studying, and it should work out nicely.
Other people can make it work. I don't believe I'm any worse than them.
So this is my next few months. Maybe I can even fit blogging in.
I once promised myself, on the campus no less, that I would never go back until I was there by my own merits. I never knew how true that would turn out. There was once upon a time I would say, "Oh, yeah, he's at MIT, no big deal." And I said it out of jealousy, because I really, really want to be there. Being related to something always hurts more, because you are so close, yet not there. Not quite good enough, or, in my case, not quite smart enough or special enough or whatever else it was.
The people around me have different goals. They want to get into the best med school possible. But it's similar, isn't it? And if I focused enough, I should be able to do this. But it means a kind of dedication and work ethic I haven't been able to muster up in a long, long while. I have been relishing in my newfound independence but I haven't been putting up much effort. This past semester has been a few months of rehashing things I have already learned and scrambling to put together things I haven't.
I have some good plans for next semester. I need to schedule them into my calendar, and more importantly, I need to follow my calendar more strictly, rather than just putting things on there. I think I can block out times when I will be able to get work done without being disturbed, and then fill them in week by week. After that, I'll also schedule in all the application work I need to get done, and studying, and it should work out nicely.
Other people can make it work. I don't believe I'm any worse than them.
So this is my next few months. Maybe I can even fit blogging in.
Friday, January 7, 2011
There Was Snow, White Snow
Five minutes from the heavily anticipated announcement of whether we will have an early dismissal or not, Mr. Littney, who had earlier asked us to discuss all of the books we had read for class thus far, asked, "What would Gregor from Metamorphosis say if he knew that a snow day was coming up?"
We stared at him for a while, not quite understanding his question.
"I think he wouldn't even notice," Mr. Littney went on to say. "I think he would be so entrenched in his routine that he wouldn't even notice there was snow. What about Return of the Soldier?"
"Chris would probably be staring out at the snow and reminiscing some wonderful moment with Margaret," someone said.
For Brave New World, Sonny said, "I think there wouldn't be any snow. They would just make it go away." Some else said, "People couldn't have snowball fights unless they used complicated machinery that increased consumption."
For Hamlet, Cammie said, "Hamlet would probably be the superintendent, trying to decide whether we should have an early dismissal or not." And Mr. Littney added, "Whether 'tis nobler in the mind, to have an early dismissal or to suffer until 2:15."
And for Aura, Mr. Littney said, "You look outside at the snow, and it is not snow anymore!" "And cats are burning on the trees," someone else added.
Oh, English.
(At the beginning of class, we had a one-minute discussion of the snow, which included Mr. Littney saying, "This is AP, get nothing and expect even less," in response to the collective groan when he pulled up the blinds so we could better stare at the tantalizing snow falling outside.)
. . .
We had our early dismissal, after all. I came home realizing that if we had not had an early dismissal, I would have had to explain multiple incomplete homeworks. And it wasn't that I had banked on the possibility of a snow day—I went to bed fully prepared to plot out my day according to the plan that there would be a full day of school.
There is lethargy in the air. Scatter-brained.
My back hurts. I thought it was because I sleep in shriveled-up positions, but now that I think about it, perhaps it is more because I had been leaning against unforgiving edges for a prolonged time yesterday. I am not the flexible girl I used to be, the one who could raise her feet to almost behind her head. That was years ago. This is now. This is painful.
I am tired, I am sleepy, and it is but a week since our last break. I slept a ridiculous amount during break, extended, 12+ hours. Sometimes 18. Sometimes more.
Sometimes I want to sleep even more, but it is now painful to lie down on my back, so sleep will, once again, be elusive.
. . .
My dad is talking about one of my cousins, who dated a boy in high school throughout college. The boy went to a better school. My parents often said that was the reason they broke up right at the end of college.
The cousin got a job half a country away, in a factory, and there, she met her future husband. Who cheated on her. She got a divorce and moved back home.
And in China, a divorce is still a huge deal. It is reputation-destroying. You won't ever be the same anymore.
At home, she found someone else, a man with a child.
Which is somehow even worse. These are some values I cannot, cannot agree with. But they are reality. I am not in accord with reality.
My dad does not approve of this relationship (neither does my grandmother, for that matter). He thinks it won't work out. Ever the optimist, he is. He will, most likely, have little say in this matter, but he has a lot of say in other matters closer to home.
. . .
The days are long, and the nights longer. Long Day's Journey into Night. I think I make up for my lack of TV-knowledge with a good deal of literary references. I am not sure if that is any better. If one is inherently better than the other, or if it is merely a change in perspectives and roots.
We stared at him for a while, not quite understanding his question.
"I think he wouldn't even notice," Mr. Littney went on to say. "I think he would be so entrenched in his routine that he wouldn't even notice there was snow. What about Return of the Soldier?"
"Chris would probably be staring out at the snow and reminiscing some wonderful moment with Margaret," someone said.
For Brave New World, Sonny said, "I think there wouldn't be any snow. They would just make it go away." Some else said, "People couldn't have snowball fights unless they used complicated machinery that increased consumption."
For Hamlet, Cammie said, "Hamlet would probably be the superintendent, trying to decide whether we should have an early dismissal or not." And Mr. Littney added, "Whether 'tis nobler in the mind, to have an early dismissal or to suffer until 2:15."
And for Aura, Mr. Littney said, "You look outside at the snow, and it is not snow anymore!" "And cats are burning on the trees," someone else added.
Oh, English.
(At the beginning of class, we had a one-minute discussion of the snow, which included Mr. Littney saying, "This is AP, get nothing and expect even less," in response to the collective groan when he pulled up the blinds so we could better stare at the tantalizing snow falling outside.)
. . .
We had our early dismissal, after all. I came home realizing that if we had not had an early dismissal, I would have had to explain multiple incomplete homeworks. And it wasn't that I had banked on the possibility of a snow day—I went to bed fully prepared to plot out my day according to the plan that there would be a full day of school.
There is lethargy in the air. Scatter-brained.
My back hurts. I thought it was because I sleep in shriveled-up positions, but now that I think about it, perhaps it is more because I had been leaning against unforgiving edges for a prolonged time yesterday. I am not the flexible girl I used to be, the one who could raise her feet to almost behind her head. That was years ago. This is now. This is painful.
I am tired, I am sleepy, and it is but a week since our last break. I slept a ridiculous amount during break, extended, 12+ hours. Sometimes 18. Sometimes more.
Sometimes I want to sleep even more, but it is now painful to lie down on my back, so sleep will, once again, be elusive.
. . .
My dad is talking about one of my cousins, who dated a boy in high school throughout college. The boy went to a better school. My parents often said that was the reason they broke up right at the end of college.
The cousin got a job half a country away, in a factory, and there, she met her future husband. Who cheated on her. She got a divorce and moved back home.
And in China, a divorce is still a huge deal. It is reputation-destroying. You won't ever be the same anymore.
At home, she found someone else, a man with a child.
Which is somehow even worse. These are some values I cannot, cannot agree with. But they are reality. I am not in accord with reality.
My dad does not approve of this relationship (neither does my grandmother, for that matter). He thinks it won't work out. Ever the optimist, he is. He will, most likely, have little say in this matter, but he has a lot of say in other matters closer to home.
. . .
The days are long, and the nights longer. Long Day's Journey into Night. I think I make up for my lack of TV-knowledge with a good deal of literary references. I am not sure if that is any better. If one is inherently better than the other, or if it is merely a change in perspectives and roots.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Honesty First
On the online application for any retail job at a Stop&Shop store, it asks (something along these lines), "Have you ever taken supplies from the store (minor office supplies not included) without telling your store manager?"
Then you get to choose how much you took or, if you didn't take anything, the "none" option.
For the ShopRite application, not only does it warn you that the application will take around 45-60 minutes, it also makes you sign up for an account so you can save your information prior to submitting. I don't understand why they can't just make the applications shorter and cut out some of the stupid questions. Like, have you stolen money from your previous employer?
Seriously? If I had, would I be telling you?
Anyway. Bryant today tried to tell me about his woeful Friday, when he has five tests, and I nodded along, trying to pretend I was paying attention. Honestly, Bryant, I don't care how many tests you have. Stop complaining to me. I've got enough to worry about for myself.
But of course, instead of saying that out loud, I listened to him speculate that we would have a multi test within this week. And whine about his utexas. Among numerous other things I would not have expected to come from him, but since I never really sat close to him for extended periods of time, maybe I've just not been exposed to his more, uh, not content side.
In other (more interesting, perhaps) news, the Penn representative who was supposed to come to our school today did not show up. Or at least, I think she did not show up. The bell rang fifteen minutes after she was supposed to come, and I had an econ test next, so I told myself, "Oh, I'll wait a few more minutes." Then I saw Mr. Wollen walk by the door, so I decided, oh well, econ test is more important than listening to something I probably know already anyway.
I got an email later from my counselor saying that the rep is coming on Thursday. During my free.
A little sacrifice, but I can deal with that. I mean, I'm applying ED to this school, I should be able to sacrifice some things.
Which reminds me, yesterday, after I asked Bryant if he had a blue tie (he doesn't, but he has a red one and gold one), he randomly asked, "Just out of curiosity, where are you applying early?"
I wonder how long he's been waiting to ask me that?
I asked Dino too (about the tie), and he said, "I don't have any ties," and refused to answer my question as to why his profile picture clearly shows him in a tie. Then, as I elaborated that I'd like stripes on that tie, he asked, "Are you kidding?" Way to trust my totally legitimate inquiries.
Later on, he told me that Tybalt had such a tie, which is a complete lie.
Then you get to choose how much you took or, if you didn't take anything, the "none" option.
For the ShopRite application, not only does it warn you that the application will take around 45-60 minutes, it also makes you sign up for an account so you can save your information prior to submitting. I don't understand why they can't just make the applications shorter and cut out some of the stupid questions. Like, have you stolen money from your previous employer?
Seriously? If I had, would I be telling you?
Anyway. Bryant today tried to tell me about his woeful Friday, when he has five tests, and I nodded along, trying to pretend I was paying attention. Honestly, Bryant, I don't care how many tests you have. Stop complaining to me. I've got enough to worry about for myself.
But of course, instead of saying that out loud, I listened to him speculate that we would have a multi test within this week. And whine about his utexas. Among numerous other things I would not have expected to come from him, but since I never really sat close to him for extended periods of time, maybe I've just not been exposed to his more, uh, not content side.
In other (more interesting, perhaps) news, the Penn representative who was supposed to come to our school today did not show up. Or at least, I think she did not show up. The bell rang fifteen minutes after she was supposed to come, and I had an econ test next, so I told myself, "Oh, I'll wait a few more minutes." Then I saw Mr. Wollen walk by the door, so I decided, oh well, econ test is more important than listening to something I probably know already anyway.
I got an email later from my counselor saying that the rep is coming on Thursday. During my free.
A little sacrifice, but I can deal with that. I mean, I'm applying ED to this school, I should be able to sacrifice some things.
Which reminds me, yesterday, after I asked Bryant if he had a blue tie (he doesn't, but he has a red one and gold one), he randomly asked, "Just out of curiosity, where are you applying early?"
I wonder how long he's been waiting to ask me that?
I asked Dino too (about the tie), and he said, "I don't have any ties," and refused to answer my question as to why his profile picture clearly shows him in a tie. Then, as I elaborated that I'd like stripes on that tie, he asked, "Are you kidding?" Way to trust my totally legitimate inquiries.
Later on, he told me that Tybalt had such a tie, which is a complete lie.
